Showing posts with label what to do in life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label what to do in life. Show all posts

Saturday, 5 December 2015

Is happiness overrated?

The term “positive psychology” is often thought to be synonymous with “happiness.”
But according to Martin Seligman, widely considered the founder of the field, there’s more to positive psychology than happiness—and, more importantly, there’s more to life than happiness as well.
Martin Seligman
Seligman is featured in a New York Timescolumn today by John Tierney, exploring the limits of the concept of happiness.
Tierney reports that Seligman has come to believe that the term “happiness” is too often confused with just feeling good; instead, leading a good, truly happy life requires more than positive emotions. To truly maximize our “well-being”—or to “flourish” (the title of Seligman’s new book)—we need five crucial elements, which Seligman summarizes in an acronym he recently created, Perma: positive emotions, engagement (the feeling of being lost in a task, aka “flow”), relationships, meaning, and accomplishment.
In other words, “Well-being cannot exist just in your own head,” Seligman writes in Flourish. “Well-being is a combination of feeling good as well as actually having meaning, good relationships, and accomplishment.”


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Seligman’s take on happiness and well-being really resonates with us here at Greater Good—it explains why our tagline is “The Science of a Meaningful Life” rather than, say, “The Science of Happiness.” The term “happiness” often simply implies feeling good, conjuring images of someone with a smile plastered on his face, blissfully unaware of the world around him—not really what you think of as the “greater good.”
The definition of “happiness” can seem highly subjective. And the things that might make some of us feel good in the moment aren’t necessarily the things that make life feel worth living. Lots of studies show that more money doesn’t bring more happiness—but even if it did, wouldn’t we still feel that there’s more to life than owning a second home? Or, as Tierney wonders, if life’s just about pleasure and moment-to-moment happiness, why do people have kids? He writes,
Some happiness researchers have suggested that parents delude themselves about the joys of children: They focus on the golden moments and forget the more frequent travails. But Dr. Seligman says that parents are wisely looking for more than happy feelings.
“If we just wanted positive emotions, our species would have died out a long time ago,” he says. “ We have children to pursue other elements of well-being. We want meaning in life. We want relationships.”
This doesn’t suggest that pursuing happiness is totally unimportant and irrelevant to a good life. But it does suggest that we should broader our notion of true happiness—it’s much more than momentary feelings of joy and a positive mood.

Tuesday, 1 December 2015

Hour of power thoughts

I was reading happiness hypothesis book by J.Haidt and I thought to share a line that i found there.

Happiness= Biological set points ( your genes) + conditions of life ( what life through at you and how you perceive it) + voluntary activity  ( what you do on daily bases to keep your happiness, spread happiness to others and enjoy the moment )

The only thing you can't change is your genes, everything else is up for grab.







My hour of power involve
1. meditation 5-15 min day
2. exercise 3-4 times week
3. read a clever thought every day
4. Encourage somebody else to pass their time of difficulty with a warm world, encouragment
5. Listen to a TED talk a day.
6. write this blog

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.


My path to happiness is to look after your body, mind, soul, friendship and family and ispire to greatness.

"Set your heart on doing good. Do it over and over again and you will be filled with joy. Afool is happy until his mischief turns againt him and a good man suffers until his goodness flowers"- Buddha


What is your hour of power?????????????
Do you have on hour of power?????????

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Wednesday, 14 October 2015

I am satistied

"I am statisfied , don't be upset for me " this is the last word that a 80y old mum told he daughter before dying.

I was listening to a lecture from a doctor about her experince and this word stuck with me. Her mum had found a way to be happy and the last words were as her life been satistied.

Remeber she was not questoning it, this is a statement - I am satisfied.
, what is you statement? appart from i am tired, i am frustated, i am lonely that clutter you head and occupy your precious time. I you dont have one to guide maybe is time to write a new one.

This reminded me of not so long ago a convesation i was having with a mature lady of 96 year. She had a smile in her face even when she was not talking , that smile was stamped in her face muscle because this is the muscle she has used most in her life. I like to ask people what is secret to their happiness in life, and she replyed "Live and let live". At 96 years she was still enrolled in some clubs where she played cards and games with people of her generation, she liked to do shopping and read books of different subjects. That was the moto for her long lasting marriage and happy childrens , now in their 70s.

It makes you think, is it this easy to have happiness? But when somebody is 96 and happy and sharp , you have to listen they know something that only experince can give.



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I remembered a talk by T.Robbins that i went sometime ago. He was saying it is our stories that guide us, it is our question that guide us. If your question is how can everybody like me ? you are going to have problems because not everybody is going you and your decision as we are diffirent and our expectation and experinces differ. If you are stating i wont compromise in life to get what i want, it might sound good and most of the time will bring great success but life has many variables that don't rely on you and you need to be open that something might happen and  have an open mind  to deal with them.

Later in the lecture the dotor was saying that were 3 man , all working in rocks and turning them into blocks. They asked the first man, what was he doing. He got a bit angry, don't you see what i am doing- they brings me blocks and i shape them into blocks.
When the second man was asked he replyed, I am earning a living for my lovely family and children and my beautiful home. Last was the 3-rd man and he replyed - they were building castle, far, beautiful oblects with this blocks for meny people to admire.

What i got from these stories is that is not what we do in life that make us happy but what meaning we put to it and the story that we tell our self.

Have a great day
let me know what story are you telling you self , what question guide you consciously or unconsciously