taken from the book What you can change and what you can't- Martin Seligman (founder of positive psychology)
Millions are struggling to change, we diet , we jog , we meditate, we practice relaxation. we exercise to expand our memory and to quadruple our reading speed. we seek to loose our taste of alcohol. we seek loose our taste of alcohol.
Sometimes these works , but when it doesn't the effects are drastic as we think we are worthless, we feel guilty and ashamed . We believe we have no willpower and we give up trying.
Our genes affects a lot of our personality trait and intelligence, musical talent, our conscience are result of it more than ever thought.
Here are some facts about what we can change
- Panic can be easily unlearned, but nor cured with medications
- The sexual dysfunctions - fragility, impotence, premature ejaculation are easily unlearned
- Our moods, which can wreak havoc with our physical health are readily controlled
- Depression can be cured with straightforward changes in conscious thinking or helped with medication, but it can not be cured by insight into childhood.
- Optimism is a learned skill. Once learned , it increases achievement at work and improved physical health.
Facts about what doesn't change
- Dieting in the long run , almost never works.
- Kids do not become androgynous easily.(is the combination of masculine and feminine characteristics)
- No treatment has shown to improve on the natural course of recovery from alcoholism.
- Homosexuality does not become heterosexuality.
- Relieving childhood trauma does not undo adult personality problems.
In his book the author goes on to talk about developing strategies with coping with things that we can not change or are very hard to change as many depends on our genes and the way we evolved.
what have you tried to change and couldn't????
what did you change successfully?????
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