Why Love hurt so much?

There is a great deal of research done on love its chemistry since the 90s, before if was thought to be a fluffy subject to discuss and it was thought to be mystery. 
With the help of fMRI ( functional Magnetic resonance ) we can see what is happening in the brain of people in love.

 

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We are interested on two types of love, companionship love ( love for friends, some family members, children's) and passionate love ( love for our partner).
There are high level of hormones that are raised in the head of passionates lovers and the PEA (Phenylethylamine ) occurs naturally in the brain and acts as a natural amphetamine, promoting feelings of infatuation when we are in love. We might stay up all night interacting with someone new we find attractive! When we start to fall in love, dopamine and norepinephrine levels also go up. These are the same hormones that rise when we win a prize, take drugs such as cocaine, or when we are frightened or angry.) 

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These hormones result in a infatuation - high dopamine results in a feeling of addiction or obsession, while high norepinephrine results in an intense interaction with physical giddiness. 

When studies the brains of people with OCD ( obsessive compulsive disorder) the same level of hormone profile was found. This is believed to be part of the evolution so partners can get obsessed and addictive to each -other presence in order to produce off spring. This hormone start reducing after a period that the partner are together and the oxytocin takes priority that gives more of the caring and attachments that parents and mostly mothers have for their children's.

Why love hurts so much, apart from psychological pain there is the withdrawal effects of these hormones not being produced in the brain.

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There is one trick of nature that we need to be aware of. In some situation when the body is in a state of high excitation from other causes like like clubs with music, alcohol , dancing these hormones are high and when a person we like is near we mistake that for attractiveness and many people end up having the night with the new person found and regretting it the following day.

So when falling in love don't forget the pain and pleasure is a mixture of hormones and psychological mixtures, that is why separation hurts.

Have  a great weekend 

Bruna