Many claim that happiness is currency of life. Like money is currency of exchange. why is happiness important. Because according to research happy people live longer, are more creative, get less frustrated, have less heart disease and recover quickly from diseases. Happy people get less dementia in old age and are more open to opportunities when young.
Can you have positive emotions all the time ? not really.
But if the ratio is 3:1 at work with colleagues, friends( 3 positive emotions for a negative one ) that this is a good life.
It is important to know that in relationship the ratio is 5:1 just to make things more tricky. All relationships with lower ration have high divorce rate.
Why happiness is the currency of life. because at the bottom of every pursuit, goal after asking many times the question "why " we will come back to happiness. i.e. I like to buy that fast shinny car/ or big family car. Why? because is beautiful?
Why is beautiful ? because you can drive fast?
Why do you want to drive fast? because i want to get to places quicker?
Why do want to get to places quicker? because i like to be time efficient?
Why do want to be time efficient ? because i feel i am in control and that makes me happy.
Do you know what is happiness to you? can you measure it? When will you achieve it do you know what it entails?
image. www.lifehack.org
I thought initially that having a well payed job, and buying a home will make me happy. And it did for 6 months than I was looking for my next challenge. I didn't know that this is called " Hedonic adaptation" even if I had won the lottery i would have adjusted to that and my happiness maximum would have lasted 2 years.
I thought marrying the love of your life will make you happy, but research report that even when you get along well, are compacted together the happiness last 2 years after that you will go back to the same level of happiness that you had before you got married.
Your level of happiness depends 50% you genes,
10% external circumstances ( car, house in the beach, designer clothes ) and
40% what you do.
There are 2 things that we as human find it unable to adapt that is loud noise and commuting.
I thought having recurrent holidays will make me happy, and holidays are great time to unwind but if you think the happiness is somewhere in the sun and not in your town the effects of the holidays on your mood will be short lived.
There is some truth in Freuds and Victor Frankl theories. We need to gratify both the will for pleasure and the will for meaning if we are to lead a fulfilling and happy life.
To do. very simple exercises that if you do will greatly improved your outlook of life.
I know what is easy to do is easy not to do too.
Take a pen and do this.
1. Write 3 things that you are happy about , in life, work relationship only 3 in total. every day for 21 days and that had been proved to increase your level of happiness.
2. White a thank you note to somebody that really helped you. It will be better to hand delivered it to see the face of the person receiving it. 1 letter a month or 1 every week
3. Write a heart felt forgiveness letter to somebody. Forgiveness will set you free. 1 letter per month.
All these 3 done over the course of 1 month have been proven to increase your life satisfaction.
Go on you have nothing to loose.
Try and let me know , what is you experience. Ask questions that are bothering you and I will be happy to answer.
Be positive and happy.
B
p.s for further reading
Book " Fluorish "- M. Seligman
Book "Happier " - Tal Ben-shahar
"man search for meaning "- Victor Frankl
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